To Be or Not To Be Lesbian

A week ago Sunday my girlfriend (ha ha) Kris and I attended this lawn and garden show in Temple. While there she purchased a SWEET hot tube. I was all excited getting into the tube pretending there was water in it. The sales associate actually said "man you would think there really was water in it" Anyways, before the sale she was talking to Kris and I in this weird manner. Yep she thought we was an "item". Kris very welled cleared that one up for us. I was laughing. Oh how Lisa was laughing. Kris wasn't laughing. She was more like - NO, we do NOT live together, we are NOT a couple bla, bla, bla it was funny. After that I started to pretend like I was some kind of an assistant to Mrs. Kris King. When she would pull off her coat I was all like " would you like me to hold that for you mam'' and I did a couple more things. Well of course I did. That is just how Lisa works. That poor lady. Kris bought the Jacuzzi. Thank you Kris. Friday Kris, well Mrs. King had to work. Like a good friend who wanted to get in the tube on Friday night. I was there so it to be installed. Hours later the delivery men arrived with it. They was staring at me in this weird way. A way that was familiar. I don't know kind of like the way the sales associate was staring/talking to us. Finally he couldn't hold back any longer. He was all noisy and this dude just came out and asked. Is this "our" first hot tube purchase. Does Mrs. King and I enjoy hot tubes, have we been in them together before.. So I about spit out my drink and I kind of said a bad word. " @#$% NO we are not Lesbians, we have husbands which are both deployed together, we are real good friends who take care of each other and not in that way" then he started giggling. I was cracking up. Kiersten was rolling her eyes like she knew what the men was implying laughing along with us. He said "sorry, I just thought" I then told him that if I was I would be the man of the relationship. How strange not even in a weeks time period two different incidents being questioned if you was a lesbian. The tube couldn't finish being installed for what ever reasons, this company is going to call me to make an appointment cause Kris works out of town. They asked for my name and I couldn't hold it back. I said "Lisa, Lisa King" then he is looking at me all cocked eyed. I never told him anything different!!!! I think this week I will just stay at the house. For real I think it is hard enough for Ryan to put up with me many of the times. Could you imagine if I was married to a woman? Oh I just about threw up on that last sentence. Kris I love you an all but no, I just don't think our relationship would work out if we was to get married. You would sure take care of me though!!!!! You would be my Sugar mama!!!!